Moments by Andrea

Not your typical looking lawyer! This fun, friendly and approachable divorce lawyer wanted new images for her website so she came to my Wilton studio and we got to work. We took advantage of the natural light shooting room with the in home environment as well as the studio with black and white backgrounds. Here are a few favorite pictures including two full body standing portraits, full body seated and a close up head shot.

Who is this lovely lawyer?

“With offices in both New York and Connecticut, Heidi E. Opinsky and her team of legal professionals at Jones Morrison, LLP, are dedicated to providing clients throughout the region with superior legal representation. In fact, Ms. Opinsky works tirelessly every day to exceed her clients’ expectations ― she truly exemplifies a client-centered commitment to the practice of law. With more than 30 years of legal experience, Ms. Opinsky not only understands the intricacies of moderate and high net worth divorces, but also possesses the insight and knowledge necessary to help optimize her clients’ outcomes.”- Taken with permission from Heidi’s website: www.ctnydivorcelawyer.com (new images to be replacing the ones on there now).

 

 

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Headshot or head shot, either way you write it, you know you need one! It’s just the thought about getting it done can be overwhelming. Most people would rather go to the dentist then to get their picture taken!

I have to say looking at Linked In and professional websites, it amazes me how few people actually have professional headshots! I really think that in today’s market you really need one to be competitive!

Everyone needs a great head shot today! We used them on Linkedin, our own websites, social media sites like Facebook as well as on some applications, in press releases and on your marketing materials. A selfie or a picture of you cut out from a family portrait, just won’t cut it if you want to look professional!

These are my top ten tips for getting a headshot. Tips are geared toward women in the workforce but many can still be used by men.

1. Find a professional headshot photographer in your area that specializes in head shots! If you are going to do this, you want it done right! I’ve done too many retakes for clients that originally went with a less experienced photographer to save money. Might as well get it done right the first time. Too much goes into lighting, posing and retouching to create the final image that makes you look amazing. You need an experienced professional to look your absolute best. This will be your headshot for a few years. It’s worth the investment.

2. Take a look at their sample work so you can tell them which images you like best. It will give the photographer an idea of what you want your headshot to look like. Don’t like their images? Find another photographer. Don’t expect them to replicate something they see done by someone else. They might not be trained in lighting or posing needed to accomplish the look you like.

3. Prepare ahead of time to look your best for your headshot! Book that hair color a good week before your session. Hair cut can be done the same day BUT don’t try anything new the day of your shoot. You want to feel comfortable and confident, not concerned about your new hair cut. If you aren’t in need of a haircut then at least book a blow dry that day.

4. Consider professional makeup. The camera does not lie and while yes, Photoshop can help, it’s best to look as good as you can and that includes professional hair and makeup. It should be a little heavier for pictures than it is for everyday wear.

5. Wear a dark blazer with a solid color blouse under it. I suggest a color that is flattering to your face and skin tone. A white collared shirt is indeed professional but not always the most flattering. A feminine neckline is a nice touch or a classic neckline that is high enough to be in the picture when cropped so you don’t look naked under your blazer.

6. IRON your clothing! Wrinkles are hard to get out of photos and really do look unprofessional.

7. Bring OPTIONS of clothing and accesories to your photographers studio the day of the shoot. He/she can help you pick the best choice for your headshot. It’s frustrating when a client shows up in one outfit that really is not flattering in photos and we have no options to change into.

8. Watch your posture!! A good headshot can be ruined by poor posture. Most of us don’t sit up as straight as we think we do. Pretend someone is pulling a string on top of your head (like you were a marionette) and lean toward the camera stretching your face forward just a touch. This will give you a longer neck and thinner face! Something most women want!

9. Change it up! With each click of your photographers shutter you should change your look or position slightly. Even the littlest change can make the difference between an ok photo and an image that makes you say wow!!

10. Ask them to be someone natural on the retouching. You don’t want glowing white teeth or skin with no wrinkles or texture. You want to look like yourself so when you walk into that interview or client meeting, they can recognize you from your photo. Ten years and ten pounds younger is usually about what I do for my clients and it seems just right. On occasion I might take off a little more weight but definitely not more than ten years in age.

Get out there and get it done today. You don’t know when you will need it! Better to be prepared!

Fairfield County CT headshot photographer Andrea Topalian of Moments by Andrea Photography offers headshots in her Wilton studio and on location in Fairfield County. She specializes in flattering headshots of women that show them as confident and professional yet kind and approachable. www.headshotsbyandrea.com

 

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Fairfield County, CT- the ”Gold Coast” and the setting for ”The Stepford Wives” certainly has it’s reputation for “picture perfect” families but is anyone really perfect?

I ran into an friend recently that got me thinking about the topic of being “picture perfect”. She said with a smile on her face and a joking but serious tone, “I have to say that every time I see one of your photos you’ve taken of someone I know, I think that I know that women and yes, she is pretty but not THAT pretty!”. 

The fact is that she’s right! Professional photography is about showing people at their best, not how they look on the sidelines at their kid’s soccer games. A little help from posing, lighting, hair, makeup, wardrobe and even Photoshop and we can all be “picture perfect”. My head shot is an example of that! I certainly don’t look this good every day! 😉

We might not look like models but everyone is beautiful and I see it as my job to show people (women in particular) how beautiful they are because most of us don’t believe it!

Most women hate being photographed and don’t think they take good pictures.  We are our own worst critics!  It’s sad that so many women spend more time envying others and wishing their appearance were different. They fail to see the beauty staring back at them in the mirror because they are so focused on their own flaws. For me it’s my big head, naturally large frame and thick midsection and arms. Even when I’m at my thinnest, those things bother me.

What about the women that really DO look THAT good in their regular life? Here in Fairfield County, CT we have a reputation for having a lot of these women. The ones with the awesome bodies, beautiful faces, amazing hair, designer clothes, fancy cars and big homes. Do they think they are perfect? No, they are human! I bet if ask any of them, they will tell you that they are flawed! It’s the nature of the woman. We all find our flaws and hone in on them! Plus I imagine it’s exhausting trying to maintain that appearance of perfection! Glad I don’t have to do it! 😉

Other people see these “picture perfect” women  and families and envy them, thinking they have it all! They are “picture perfect” but remember PICTURES are ONE DIMENSIONAL! You can’t see what’s behind or inside them! Just because their lives look perfect, doesn’t mean that they are so!

Facebook doesn’t help either! The daily posts by friends about how great life is and the shared images of the perfect life can really do some serious damage on a woman’s self worth.

I apologize but as a professional family photographer, I perpetuate that issue by capturing perfect moments of pure joy and connection where everyone looks beautiful and is filled with love for each other. Those moments are real but that doesn’t mean that is how those families are all the time!  I don’t post the behind the scenes images of sibling fights, frustrated parents or baby melt downs, but let me tell you, there are a lot of them! Honestly, those meltdown images are some of my favorite moments because they are REAL and RAW! In my home, those are the ones I have as canvases on my walls! Trust me, nobody’s family is perfect but we all have perfect moments and it’s my job to capture them!

My experience getting to know women and their families confirms my believe that EVERYONE has their OWN STRUGGLES!  No matter how “picture perfect” they look in photos or even driving around town in their Range Rover with their perfect yogi/runner bodies dressed head to toe in Lululemon driving their 2.5 kids and golden retriever to travel soccer games and the country club, nobody’s life is perfect even if they look like it is!

I have learned the saying is true! “You can’t judge a book by it’s cover!”

I LOVE PEOPLE and because of that I often end up in deep conversations with them, especially women. Time and again, I discover that even people who look perfect, are actually struggling with something. It might be inner struggle from trauma in their childhood. It could be poor body image despite being in top shape. They could have marriage troubles or a kid with health issues or challenging disabilities. They might be about to claim bankruptcy despite living in a big home and driving the best cars. You just never know!

We are all just doing the best we can!

Whether you are the one with the perfect body, big house and fancy cars or the one judging those women, I challenge you!

I ask you to take down your walls and reveal your vulnerabilities with other women. Get to know them for who they are and let them know YOU!

Don’t feel that you have to be the perfect and show only the side of you that you think society wants to see. Be YOU…all of YOU!

I can tell you from my own experience , we are all struggling in some way and revealing our challenges and reaching out to others is where the HEALING BEGINS!

Next time you stop and see those “picture perfect” women, stop and remember, that’s just their appearance. They are people too and they have their own struggles and insecurities. Instead of letting envy take over your thoughts, take a moment to reflect on what makes you beautiful and lucky. Just like we are all have our struggles, we also all have blessings!

I’m guilty of this myself. Trust me!

I harp on my life long endless struggles with weight (will I ever be thin again!), abandonment issues from my mother’s three divorces and the challenges of caring for her as Alzheimer’s slowly robs her of her retirement years, all while raising my kids and running a business.  Those are my biggest (but certainly not only) challenges and they weigh heavily on my mind.

I also am incredibly cognizant and appreciative of my blessings! My health, my amazing husband, my healthy super funny awesome kids, the financial means to comfortably raise them in a great town with a wonderful school system, loving my work. I know, I really am blessed but so are you!

What are your blessings? They might not be obvious and they might be buried behind an incredibly full plate of struggles (some unfortunately get more than others) but they ARE THERE! Find them and focus on them!! That will be one step to lead you toward happiness!

These are my blessings and I’m thankful for them every day!

 

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You would think that sharing my inner struggle as a mom would be harder than picking which images to share in my Good Morning Wilton Mother’s Day article (please read and share) but it wasn’t! Mommy and me moments have always been a focus of mine so I have a ton that I LOVE so that was the hardest part of this article.

I have hundreds of mommy & me moments captured that are so special to me but I’m not great at cataloging my images so I had to just search for them randomly. I’m missing some great ones! Happy Mother’s Day to all the moms and a big hug to my mommy clients!! Thank you for allowing me the GIFT of capturing these moments for your family!! xoxoxoxoxxo

Article in Good Morning Wilton:

https://goodmorningwilton.com/on-mothers-day-one-moms-quest-to-find-balance-and-be-present/

See below for some shout outs to some of the many women supporting me in my mommy/business owner life!

Writing this story came naturally, as I’ve always been an open book. Sharing myself with others is easy. Revealing my weaknesses and admitting my faults as a mom, not so much BUT knowing that it could possibly help even one other mom makes it worth doing. Thank you Heather for asking me to write a piece for Mother’s Day for your readers.

I want to use this as a chance to thank my circle of amazing women who have helped me on this journey of self discovery and change! It started with my dear friend/walking buddy I met at Fairfield University before we became moms. I was blessed to end up raising children in the same town years later and going for walks with her which were more like therapy sessions! Thank you Victoria Kantor for your friendship and spiritual support leading me to read Eckhart Tolle and starting me on this journey! I miss YOU!!

Facebook (as bad as it was for me on so many levels) led me two THREE of the most amazingly supportive groups of women! My Wilton SBO group, my groups of women photographers  and my assistant admins on Wilton CT 411, who became my mentors, inspiration and support. Friendships that started on Facebook but came to life in the real world and will go on forever.

From my Wilton SBO group I became connected with Alison Jacobson and she took on the role of my business and life coach! She also is an amazing divorce coach but I’m fortunate to not need those services now or ever thanks to the luck of marrying an amazing man. If you find yourself at a crossroad personally, professionally or in your marriage, reach out to Alison for a consult! She’s incredibly inspiring and her ability to see it and tell it like it is will knock you socks off and set you on the right path! Thank you Alison!

Also in that group was Loryn Galardi, a Wilton based nutritionist who runs groups and private lessons to help you on your journey to better health. She is so knowledgeable and supportive. I highly recommend her for anyone with weight or health issues that can be helped by better nutrition! I’ve been struggling with my weight since 14 so it’s not like I found a magic bullet. I know it’s a lifelong battle but Loryn’s tools are helping me reset my thinking about food and make better choices to care for my body and begin my journey to a healthier me. Thank you Loryn!

I was also fortunate to meet and forge friendships through that group with the talented Heather Herve, a woman after my own heart that truly sees only the good in this world and is driven to share it. The creation of Good Morning Wilton is proof of that!

My photographer group is large. I am proud to say that over 100 photographers in Fairfield County, other parts of CT and even the country (from Texas School & PPA) are my FRIENDS !! The way we support each other professionally and personally would be shocking to members of other professions who view their competitors as just competition!  So many of these talented women are dear to my heart but I want to give a  special shout out to the members of the original group that was formed a few years ago. Ironically we almost never talk abut photography, we’re just great girlfriends and they have helped me tremendously on this journey.  Thank you for your support and friendship Maria Fuller, Erin Bell, Laurie Wright, Shannon Dickson, Alix Martinez, Nicole Taylor and Peggy Garbus. Maria spent HOURS with me on the phone as my personal photographer/mommy mentor and cheer leader. She even had to listen to my horrible crying at breakthrough moments, not a pretty sound. I swear she has another calling as a “mommy whisperer” as she sees right through us!

One other deep bond I formed through Facebook is with the brave women who helped me admin Wilton CT 411 (and became dear friends). One woman was a neighbor I barely knew that volunteered to help me and is now one of my best friends! That page is truly an extension of who I am and what I believe in.  I’ll never forget walking into a Wilton real estate office when I started the page asking them to distribute flyers to their clients to join the page. The realtor on duty looked at me and said “I don’t’ get it. What’s in it for YOU?” She could not comprehend that I could create something like this with no financial gain. So glad I didn’t let her deter me. I have no clue who she was but I hope she got to see what was in it for ALL OF US, not me! It was terribly hard to leave 411 after giving so much of myself to it but letting it go was a big step on this journey! I’m proud of creating it and thrilled other women stepped up to take over!

And a special shout out to Anna Raimondi, a spiritual guide and medium we are fortunate to have right here in Wilton. Some of you might not believe it but Anna really does have a gift. Allowing me to connect with loved ones that have past (and still have the same personalities-it’s amazing) and giving me insight into myself and my family have been a blessing and a big part of my journey. She once told me that I joined a women’s group but stopped going to the meetings. She was right! I went to the first Wilton SBO meeting and didn’t go back for months! She said I need to go back! It would be good for me and I was meant to be there! I listened to her and that was the Wilton SBO group that has given me some of the most amazing friendships and support, including my mentor and nutritionist! There are endless stories fro my readings with Anna. Give her a try www.annaraimondi.com. It takes months to get an appointment so book now!

Those connections as well as many others are the reason why leaving Facebook was so hard but I truly believe that I would never be able to be fully present if I kept that page open. It was time to close that connection to the world but not those friendships. They will live on outside of Facebook.

I hope you enjoy reading it but please know, it’s just the beginning. I have a long way to go in perfecting the work/life balance but I’m thrilled and proud to have taken the steps to get started!

https://goodmorningwilton.com/on-mothers-day-one-moms-quest-to-find-balance-and-be-present/

The perfect Mother’s Day or Father’s Day gift! A family mini session at Ambler Farm this Spring or Summer! More info:

http://www.blog.momentsbyandrea.com/mothers-day-moment/

 

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